she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
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