you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Randomize
