Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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