the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
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I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
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Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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