Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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