carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
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