ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I am full of burrito and curiosity
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
