I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
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