After last night, I could never be a politician.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Randomize
