haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
