I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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