Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
