He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
