Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Randomize
