Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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