Texts From Last Night

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  (207): View more from Maine

  I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers

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  (207): I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers http://tfl.nu/79gv
  Replies (9) Good night (2795) Bad night (517)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.

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  (860): when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage. http://tfl.nu/ckot
  Replies (212) Good night (769) Bad night (10492)
• Favorite

  (928): View more from Arizona

  she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.

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  (928): she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college. http://tfl.nu/99x7
  Replies (50) Good night (9220) Bad night (1106)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.

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  (910): Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night. http://tfl.nu/xyp8
  Replies (16) Good night (1022) Bad night (6515)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch

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  (516): Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch http://tfl.nu/s2ci
  Replies (10) Good night (4502) Bad night (750)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?

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  (412): Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something? http://tfl.nu/z60e
  Replies (2) Good night (2424) Bad night (735)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?

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  (330): Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home? http://tfl.nu/9062
  Replies (12) Good night (4137) Bad night (787)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything

  (1-814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order

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  (814): Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything (1-814): Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order http://tfl.nu/zkyg
  Replies (0) Good night (1173) Bad night (385)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.

  (1-724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Not the worst first impression I've experienced.

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  (724): Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face. (1-724): Not the worst first impression I've experienced. http://tfl.nu/reln
  Replies (3) Good night (655) Bad night (288)
• Favorite

  (940): View more from Texas

  Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!

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  (940): Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?! http://tfl.nu/l6ig
  Replies (5) Good night (313) Bad night (1094)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him

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  (617): We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him http://tfl.nu/mgdf
  Replies (8) Good night (599) Bad night (452)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment

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  (513): I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment http://tfl.nu/26yo
  Replies (1) Good night (348) Bad night (187)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams

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  (440): Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams http://tfl.nu/en8l
  Replies (1) Good night (181) Bad night (583)
• Favorite

  (334): View more from Alabama

  So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police

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  (334): So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police http://tfl.nu/ocot
  Replies (5) Good night (1084) Bad night (172)
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  NO TEQUILA

  (1-907): View more from Alaska

  Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead

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  (907): NO TEQUILA (1-907): Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead http://tfl.nu/zozh
  Replies (0) Good night (388) Bad night (131)

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