i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
These People Made Expensive Mistakes That They’ll Regret Forever
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Things The Opposite Sex Just Doesn’t Understand
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup