I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Randomize
