so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize