He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
It's rum buckets o'clock
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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