So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
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