Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
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