her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
