You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
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