I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
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