? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
