Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
