what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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