I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
He felt like a one man threesome
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
