Walk of Shame. In a state park.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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