would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
