I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
