the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
