I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Randomize
