god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Pooping to opera.
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