in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
