Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
