I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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