Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
