How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize
