yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
It's no shave November. This is our time.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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