This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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