I like to think it a success when the cops are called
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Randomize
