i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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