Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
