Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
