so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I need moral support for this bender
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
