A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
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