my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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