i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Randomize