Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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